to be near you

I’ve been staring at this blank piece of paper for days now. Looking for words to describe the inner turmoil that’s been devouring me since the day we parted. But I found none. Distracted by a constant chanting that resonates within me. I miss you. I really miss you…

I had a dream last night. We were walking through a lush meadow filled with dandelions and wild daisies swaying freely in the invigorating late afternoon current. The sun was shining so generously. Giving life to a brilliant Persian Blue sky. We didn’t utter a word. You looked stunning in a pastel cotton dress. They fluttered in the wind as we made our way up the hill where a small cottage awaits. You were holding a bunch of flowers we picked along the way.
I was holding your hands again.

How’s life treating you lately sayang? Do you miss me? Have you had dreams about me? Did memories of us shook you up in the middle of a cold lonely night and sent you crying? Did you walk into a crowded room and wished one of them was me? Did you lie on your empty bed reminiscing about the secret pact once made under those sheets? Oh Emme, are you as miserable as I am?

Nothing seems to help anymore. Those long hours on the phone only serves as a temporary remedy. I was so afraid I’m going to forget how it felt like to have your warm body resting against mine. I need to feel your touch. I need to be in your presence. I want to hear you whisper softly in my ear, your innermost desire while your breath gushes through my skin and send shivers down my neck. I want to kiss your alluring lips and make you understand, through them, how I long for you.

I guess for now, I just have to be strong.

My only consolation is the thought that each day that passes will bring you closer to me.
Until then I’ll be standing by the gate waiting patiently for the moment when destiny calls my name, to be near you again.